


stay with me, i'm begging you.

by biksi



Series: haikyuu ship fics/oneshots [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Anxiety, College, Cuddling & Snuggling, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Forehead Kisses, Getting Together, Hurt Akaashi Keiji, Hurt/Comfort, Kinda, Light Angst, M/M, Out of Character, akaashi is lonely after bokuto graduates, but not really, theres bokuaka but kuroaka is main, toxic bokuto
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-27
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-17 18:29:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,166
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28978911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/biksi/pseuds/biksi
Summary: After Bokuto graduates, Akaashi's life changes for the worse.He's used to calling him when his anxiety got to the point where even Akaashi couldn't take it, but what happens when Bokuto says he's had enough of him and his problems?Kuroo Tetsurou comes to save the day.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Akaashi Keiji/Kuroo Tetsurou
Series: haikyuu ship fics/oneshots [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2208657
Comments: 4
Kudos: 37





	stay with me, i'm begging you.

**Author's Note:**

> as a bokuaka stan, i don't know why i'm hurting myself like this (even tho it's not that angsty). i hope that i won't rush this one like my recent oneshot lol. comments and kudos are appreciated !  
> and remember to send any requests that you have.

Akaashi's life is shit at the moment. His third year of high school is living hell. He needs to prepare for college enterance exams, he's the volleyball team captain (his underclassmen don't even seem to like him), he's playing with a completely different team due to the former third years leaving, and he's alone. Maybe only being friends with older students wasn't his brightest idea. And most importantly, he doesn't see Bokuto every day.

Bokuto Koutarou. Such a beautiful name. Everything about him is beautiful. His smile, his hair, his eyes, his thighs, his arms, the way he gets happy over the smallest things or the way his eyes used to spark whenever Akaashi said yes to setting for him. But things changed after he graduated. 

He used to be Akaashi's everything. His only reason to get up in the morning. His only reason to continue pushing through. Whenever he struggled with anything, whether or not it would be school related, Bokuto was there. There to remind him that he can't give up. There to remind him that every burn he felt in his muscles during a match will be worth it. There to remind him that every hour used on studying will be worth it in the end, where he graduates from college and gets his dream job.

He was with Akaashi through thick and thin. Always knowing how to handle his anxiety. It was known for a fact that, Bokuto was the only one who would be able to calm Akaashi at anytime. No matter if it was at lunch break, in the middle of a match, in the middle of the night during training camps or over a phone call.

And Akaahsi really needed the last one at the moment.

It was just another night where he was overthinking his whole existence. The thing that triggered this attack was the fact that Bokuto _was ignoring him._

Text after text was sent. At first, Bokuto just left him on read.

 **[akaashi]:** Bokuto-san are you free right now?  
_read 5:51 pm_

 **[akaashi]:** I need help. I can fell an attack coming and I'm home alone.  
_read 5:53 pm_

 **[akaashi]:** Please. I don't know what to do.  
_delivered 5:56 pm_

 **[akaashi]:** It's really bad.

 **[bokuto]:** busy rn. find some1 else  
**[bokuto]:** and stop spamming my phone. youre annoying.

 **[akaashi]:** Pleasde Bokuto-san. I can't.

 **[akaashi]:** I'm sorrey for beng annpyong. Just a wuick cakl.  
_read 6:07 pm_

At this point, Akaashi's hands were shaking and he couldn't see well through his tears. He couldn't believe that Bokuto just called him annoying. Normally he wouldn't mind that much, but during a vurnelable time like this it felt as he got stabbed right in the heart. Those simple words made his world spin and his lungs incapable of doing their job. He needed to call him. He needed to hear his voice. So he tried calling him. Once. Twice. Three times. And finally, on the 4th try, he answered, unpleasant sounds all around him.

_"Did I not tell you to stop annoyng me? I'm busy. I can't help you right now"_

There was yelling, music, and a lot of voices in the background, both belonging to males and females. Was Bokuto at a club?

_"P.. please Bokuto-san. I.. I can't breathe"_

_"No Akaashi. I have more important stuff to do. Do you really think you're the most important thing in my life? Well if you do, you're so wrong. I have other friends that I'll much rather spend time with right now. Stop blowing up my phone or I'll block you. I keep thinking it's important"_

Those words hit him like a train wreck. He couldn't believe that those words came out of Bokuto's mouth. No. It wasn't true. Bokuto was probably just drunk.

_But people are the most honest when they're drunk._

He tried to push that thought aside but he knew that his mind was right. Even tho he didn't seem drunk at all.

_"I... please. I'm going to die Bokuto I'm going to die"_

_"No you're not. Now delete my number and stop bothering me"_

_"No wait-"_

He was cut out by the call ending. He tried calling Bokuto again, until his number got blocked. That's it. He was completely helpless now. He tried to calm himself down but nothing worked. He curled into himself on the kitchen floor and hoped for all of it to stop.

* * *

"Bro, don't you think that was a bit too harsh?" Kuroo asked, as he saw Bokuto take another shot.

"Probably, but I don't care. I got tired of always feeling like I'm the only one trying for our friendship. Sure, he helped me with my emo modes but he was always dry, declining whenever I asked him to grab lunch or something, saying no to hanging out. The only times he called first was when he needed my help. He was just using me all these years".

"I don't think so, Bo. And even if you felt like that, you should've just talked to him about it. You know he doesn't have any friends expect you, Kenma and me. It's hard for him to socialise, and he doesn't like crowded places. He cares about you, you can't just leave him like that, especially at a time like this".

"He deserves it".

"I can't believe you, Bokuto."

Kuroo was furious. Sure, Akaashi isn't his closest friend but he still felt bad. He knew how bad his anxiety could get, so he decided to leave this party (it was boring anyway, the music sucked). He grabbed his stuff and informed the already drunk Bokuto that he was leaving. As he was walking out, he sent a few texts.

 **[kuroo]:** Akaashi? Are you alright?  
_delivered 6:31pm_

 **[kuroo]:** Hey are you there? I'm sorry for the stuff Bo said. I don't know what got into his head.  
_delivered 6:35pm_

Kuroo bit his lip. He knew Akaashi wasn't alright. He was scared that something would happen to him when he didn't even answer his calls, so he got into an uber to Akaashi's apartment.

* * *

Akaashi couldn't focus on his surrondings. His vision was blurry as he slowly raised his head from the soft surface. Wait, how did he get onto his couch? The last thing he remembers is sitting on his kitchen floor and seeing his phone light up as he got a notification. He doesn't remember making his way to his living room, laying down and covering himself with a blanket. As he slowly gained back all his senses, he could hear a faint nose from the kitchen and a tall figure cooking something. Is that...?

"Kuroo-san?"

"Oh Akaashi, finally. I was starting to get worried. I'm currently making some ramen and tea. Heh, I can't really cook otherwise I would've made onigiri. I hope that's fine".

What was Kuroo doing here? Why was he worried? He glanced at the clock and...

_Oh._

It's 11:21pm. So he was out for a couple hours. He flinched out of his thoughts by Kuroo putting a bowl on the table in front of him and giving him tea in his favorite mug. He muttered a little 'thank you' and took it. The warmth of the mug felt nice against his hands. He felt way calmer than before he went unconscious, but his thoughts were still there and he was still a bit shaken up.

"I was with Bo when he talked to you. I don't know why he said such things, it's nothing like him, and he wasn't drunk either. I don't know much about your relationship with him, but you didn't deserve to get treated like that, so I came over. Sorry for coming without permission but you wouldn't answer and I was worried, and the door was unlocked. I found you passed out on your floor, 'Kaashi. I figured out it would be the best to just have you on your couch so I could keep an eye on you while I was in the kitchen. You can move to your room if you'd like to"

"Thank you, Kuroo-san, I-"

"Just Kuroo or Tetsurou is fine, you don't have to be so formal with me".

"Okay, Kuroo. I would like to stay here because my room is messy and there's school stuff all over the floor. But can you get me my meds? They're on the kitchen counter".

Kuroo hummed in response and got the pills, together with a glass of water. Akaashi swallowed down the pills in silence.

"Do you want to talk about it?".

"No, not right now. I'm sorry. I just want to forget about him so I won't have another attack. I don't want you to deal with me".

"Okay, but just so you know you aren't a bother to me. I've helped Kenma a countless of times, so I do know how to handle your attacks very well. Do you want anythting? More pillows maybe?".

Akaashi hesitated for a second, but eventually muttered out a quiet "A hug?".

Kuroo was taken back a bit by this question. He didn't know what he expected, but this was definitely not it. Before Akaashi changed his mind, he made his way next to him, pulling him in his arms, almost taking the younger boy in his lap. Akaashi's head fit perfectly under his chin, and his currently fragile body sank into the warmth. Kuroo began to softly run his hand up and down Akaashi's back, while quietly humming a song.

It was silent, but it wasn't an awkward or tense situation. It was a comfortable one, where they both could relax. Akaashi kept his eyes closed, exhaustion taking over him, even tho he was passed out for hours. He went to pull his sleeves over his hands as he usually did (fidgeting helped a lot), but noticed something weird. This wasn't his hoodie. He recongized the logo of Kuroo's college team. Why is he wearing this?

"Kuroo-san? Oh sorry, I mean Kuroo, why am I wearing your clothes?".

"When I came here, you were only wearing a shirt, and you were shivering. I didn't want to go through your stuff without permission so I just gave you my jacket. You can take it off if you'd like".

"No no, it's fine. It's comfortable".

Kuroo smiled. Akaashi was very beautiful, even when he was tired. 

"Are you in love with Bokuto?".

Both males were taken back by that question. Where did Kuroo get all that confidence from? Akaashi bit his lip and avoided eye contact.

"Yes.. I mean I don't know. I've loved him ever since I was a first year. I loved being around him, but it was hard. He is super energetic and loud, which made it tiring for me to be around him for a long time. My social skills are at 0 and he always wanted to push me off my limits. Of course, he didn't mean any harm because I never told him how I truly felt. Most of the time I would just like to stay in my bed and do nothing. He always wanted the opposite. I didn't know I was hurting him. But I can't really answer your question right now. I never thought about being in love with him, but I'm pretty sure that I am. Or was. I don't know, okay? I don't know how I feel and it's frustrating me".

"Hey, 'Kaashi. It's totally fine not to know how you feel. I'm not going to force you to answer me. I was just curious because... You know what, I'm just going to say it. Bokuto is straight as fuck. He's probably having sex with a random girl as we speak. I just don't want you to get hurt again. I don't think Bo is the right one for you".

Akaashi knew all of that, but he didn't want to accept it. He sighed, burrying his head deeper into Kuroo's chest. He was too tired to do anything, and his meds made it even worse. He slowly drifted off to sleep, as a hand stroked his hair, twirling it around his fingers.

Kuroo watched Akaashi sleep. He hopes he did the right thing by telling him the truth. He couldn't see him get hurt again. He liked Akaashi, for a long time. But he was too scared to do anything, not wanting to ruin anything that Bokuto and Akaashi had going on. Now that he knew there was nothing left between them, would be a good time to confess.

_Wrong._

He coudln't do it right now. He coudln't take advantage of Akaashi right now. He wanted to kiss his lips so bad, but he knew he couldn't, so he settled for a forehead kiss instead. He leaned back, arms tight around the raven haired setter and muttered:

" _I love you, 'Kaashi, and I will wait for you. As long as it takes. I'll always be here"._

**Author's Note:**

> and here it is. it turned out better than i thought. i wrote it instead of doing my homework so it better be worth it.  
> bye for now:)


End file.
